The Why…

Why am I writing about pros and cons of being in a relationship? There was a question I got from Quora.com. The question was something like, what are the benefits and bad thing about being in a relationship? The person who was asking this kind of question is probably in a cloudy situation.

He could be a person who came out of relationship and looking to evaluate whether a relationship is something he needs in his or her life at that point. 
This got me curious because anyone of us can possibly go through this  situation.

And if we don’t have good ideas of what we are doing know we might end up making the worse decision. Like getting in a relationship because others are doing it. Or not being in a relationship because it’s better than being in a relationship. We don’t want that. 

Our aim here is to help us make a right or better decision. So now let’s dive into some answers. Let us now differentiate between the pros and cons of being in a relationship. 

The Basic Pros

Let’s first talk about the pros of being in a relationship. Pros are positive or beneficial, not only emotionally but mentally and physically. These pros are reasons why people stay in relationship, even sometimes they don’t no long think it’s the right relationship for them.  

1# Sexual Activity

Sex is probably one of the common reasons why people stay in a relationship. Relationship can be draining and unhealthy when couples are going through some challenges, however, when it comes to amazing sex and intimacy things can change flow dramatically. It gives a couple emotional fulfillment and a way to connect. It then plays a major role in keeping them together. 

There will come a time in our lives when we become adults and all we think about is sex. This could be caused by a part of our humanity which is trying to reproduce to prevent extinction. So it’s something we don’t even plan to do. It’s just part of our brain chemistry be that way. 

2# Companionship 

The other reason why couple stay in a relationship is the benefit of companionship. I mean, who wants to be alone, right?

Not everyone is satisfied by just having a pet cat, dog or a lion in the house, for that matter. Some times we want someone who we can connect or communicate with, and cuddle with and share our time with. 

3# Financial Security

Not everyone is born rich. In fact, the majority of people has to work to survive and thrive. Having a partner who can support us in our financial means can be a huge reason to stay in a relationship.

Although beneficial at times, without deeper connection and genuine love, this is also has a downside. Other than that, it’s one reason to stay in a relationship. People do it because sometimes they don’t see better options. This is a pro because it makes life easier.

4# Eliminate Anxiety and Depression

Believe it or not, there are many people who suffer from anxiety and depression. And one of the major causes of that is loneliness and not receiving the love that we all human crave for.

Sometimes, all we want is to feel accepted and appreciated. And one of the great solutions to that is to be in a relationship with someone who loves and appreciate you. This type of love and appreciation can’t be found in friendship.

We may have a BFF or best friends at times who spends awesome time with us, but put this in consideration… they also want to experience other things in life.

They want to spend their time with special someone, and therefore, the potential of leaving you is also great. This will make you feel insecure. But with a relationship partner, you may  have stronger bond and deeper connection.

And this may have the potential to minimize or eliminate depression or anxiety.

5# Personal Assistance

Another benefit of being in a relationship is that, if you enter into a relationship with a helpful partner, it’s like having a personal assistant. It’s hard to do everything on your own.

But when you have an assistant, you can ask him or her to do you a favor. You can ask for his or her opinion about something you’re not familiar with.

This is specially important when you have children and handling multiple tasks at once. Without assistance from a partner you may become easily overwhelm.

This causes high level of stress and anxiety. So if you are going to get a partner, get someone who is useful and willing to help you accomplish things in your life.

The Basic Cons 

Now that we have covered the pros of being in a relationship, let us now take a look at the cons or reasons not to get into relationship. Let’s face it, relationship can beneficial, but not all. Some can destroy ones health and happiness. So we want to make things clear here. Our goal is suppose to be going for something that will make us happy and complete. If a relationship doesn’t do that, then what’s the point?   

1# Less Freedom

Being in a relationship can sometimes mean you can’t just do whatever you want. Since being in a relationship means having a partner, you now have to put the other person into consideration when making decisions. But this is not always something to look down to.

However, wouldn’t it be easier if you can just make a decision to fly out of the country without your partner getting mad at you? This is what I meant by not as free as when you were single

2# Transgressing Boundaries

Do you know what boundary means in a relationship? Boundary means having your privacy. There will come a time when you just want to be alone. Imagine having your partner all the time.

You go to the store your partner is with you. You go shopping your partner is with you. Sometimes even when you go to the bathroom your partner is with you. This can be annoying.

For some people there is no problem about that. But sometimes, a can be a little bit too much. This can put stress on the relationship without noticing it. It would just feel uncomfortable. 

3# Disagreements

Being in a relationship includes making decisions, sharing opinions and so forth. Because you and your partner think differently, it’s not hard to imagine that there will be disagreements.

It’s part of every relationships. It’s just inevitable. However, this is not always a bad thing. Sometimes your partners opinion is better than yours and if you listen, it may save you a bunch of trouble.

The bad news is… not all partners in every relationship is wise and mistake free. So it’s still one of the cons. These disagreements are just the tip of the iceberg. They can actually turn into big fights, which can be a really nasty downside. But that depends on you and the partner that you choose. 

4# Time Limit

Another in being part of a relationship is that, you don’t have all day to yourself anymore. Your time for the things you want will be limited. That means you have to watch the clock.

And this can be a stressful experience. It doesn’t matter if your doing something for your business or spending time with your friends.

When you’re not spending time with your partner, your partner will probably make you feel obligated to drop what your doing and tell you to do the dishes, mow the lawn, or take her to the doctor and so on. If you are in a good relationship, you probably won’t mind it. After all, you’re doing it for someone you love. You’re doing it for your family. 

5# Worrisome and Stressful

Being in a relationship also means involvement with somebody. It’s no longer you alone that you need to worry about. If you care about your partner you may end up worrying about his or her health condition. Has she or he eaten yet?

Did she go to her appointment this week? 

And your partner will expect things from you and you have to meet her expectation or there will be problem.

Sometimes relationship is like walking on egg shells. Sometimes even just a tiny bit of mistake will turn out to be a full blown arguments. This is really worrisome and stressful.

Conclusion

In conclusion if you’re trying to figure out the answer to a question, “Is relationship good for me?” The answer is… it depends. It depends on you and who you choose.

If you choose someone who is completely compatible with you, then relationship will have a whole new different meaning than your miserable friends or neighbor. 

But get this, relationship is really not the ultimate solution to all your problems. But if you are in the right relationship, it will have tremendous positive effect on your level of happiness. And this will help you have the right mindset, which you will use to make other areas of your life even better.  

I believe the question you should be asking is NOT whether to get in or not get in a relationship, but instead how can I find the right relationship and what can I do to keep it.

And that will same you time in wasted on trying to figure things out. You already got the answer, now work with it. Make things better. Make yourself happy by finding and being in a relationship with a right partner.