You Wait for the One Perfect Girl to Just Fall In Your Lap
One of the grave mistakes guys make is that, they believe that there is this “one perfect girl” that’s going to pop up out of nowhere after. All they have to do is wait patiently. And that once she’s here they don’t have to do any work and they expect the relationship to workout without doing any personal and relationship development. They call this girl the “dream girl” and sometimes refer to as their “soul mate” for no apparent reason.
This idea seems nice and perfect, but as much as I want to agree with this concept I’m sad to say that it doesn’t work that way. I can tell you now that this concept came from lack of understanding of how human minds works. The people who adapted to this concept are people who lack experience in real world relationship coupled with what fantasy the hollywood movies are feeding their minds.
What you need to understand about hollywood movies is that, movie industry is serious with their business and their goal is to make movies that will generate the most money possible. It means that they would probably use whatever is the most appealing to their viewers or the events that they hope to happen real life. They know people’s mind respond positively to the things that they can only experience in their fantasies.
The problem is, we want to experience things that we don’t have. Things like nice cars, luxurious house, perfect relationships, expensive super yacht and so on. The things that we feel like we can only dream of are the ones we fantasize about. And we know most of us can’t so how do we experience them without going into enormous debts and without having to kill ourselves at work or without having to take so many risk?… That’s right, it is by just sitting back and watching them on tv shows and movies.
We all want the easy way if possible. That is how our minds are wired to do. Our mind want to avoid scary risks and run towards the simplest, most pleasurable method of acquiring stuff as much as possible. That is why the hollywood movies win.
Now, I have nothing against hollywood movies. I actually admire them for their ingenuity and their incredible visions. So the problem here is not the hollywood but how we respond to their products. Do you let their movies inspire you to take action to achieve your fantasies or do you just decided to sit back, watch and not take any actions?
If you’re one of these guys, you might be suffering the Oneitis disease. So what is the Oneitis and what are the symptoms of having it and is there any cure for it? That’s what we are going to talk about.
Oneitis is really not a physical disease as others might think. It’s not going to kill you physically but it will cause you to lose your fighting spirit. It’s psychological. Someone who has Oneitis mindset believes that whoever is the most appealing to them, even though that person has put them in friend zone… is still the one. The one that they will have a relationship with, the one that they will marry, the one they will have babies with. The worse part is in spite of all of her b.s. and obscure disrespectful behaviors the Oneitis guy still believe all these even though that girl has not reciprocated the love and attention he gives her. This is very sad and depressing.
But lets take a look at what’s really happening here. So you’ve decided to focus on just one girl who friend-zoned you and treats you like a girlfriend, what does that mean? It means that you sell yourself short. It means, you’re deciding to subconsciously eliminate all other options. And when you eliminate all other options, what you’re really doing is your giving up all other opportunities to meet better ones. You have to be honest with yourself. How can you say that this girl you’re pursuing is the best one for you if she hasn’t even done anything to build your relationship?
Guys like this need to wake up. Because you’re riding a train that has broken train track and its about to hit the edge of a cliff. You need to save yourself. It may seem like its fine right now, but later on it will have a devastating effect on you psychologically, emotionally, financially and so forth. It’s devastating because you will miss out on a girl who is truly deserving of your love and attention. You don’t want to live your life in the pain of regrets.
This idea of you wishing and hoping for this under-qualified girl will only cause you repeated cycles of hopes followed by seemingly never-ending heartaches and disappointments. Guys like this don’t really love themselves. Why? Because they lie to themselves about what they can and cannot achieve only because they’re so afraid to fail. And are not willing to reinvent themselves.
Is Keeping Your Eyes on This One(chick) is About Faithfulness or Self-Deception?
One of the common excuses that guys give is that they want to be faithful to this one person. There is nothing wrong with being faithful. I highly revere men who are faithful. Faithful men are real men. But if you cannot honestly write down a list of big reasons that screams “this girl is the best for you”, then it’s probably just you lying to yourself.
Faithfulness should only be practice in a relationship. If you are not in a relationship with this girl then you’re both not in a position for romantic faithfulness. If you want to be faithful then get in a relationship first and then be faithful, not the other way around.
The Real Problem: You’re On Red Pill
The real problem is your belief. It’s time to wake up. It’s time to take the Blue Pill(The reality pill which will awaken you to the truth). It’s time to stop lying to yourself. It’s time to stop being a wuss and man up to the truth. What is the truth? The truth is that there are billions of people here on Earth. It means that you have a lot of options. But the real question you should ask is, why aren’t you getting any of these options? That’s what we are going to talk about next.
The Blue Pill is the Cure
Now that you know that you’ve lived in wonderland by being on Red Pill, It’s time to re-awaken yourself to the truth. The truth that there are other much better options and that the problem is you. You have not done the inner work, the self-development, which will cause you to become on demand in the eyes of the opposite sex.
This is when personal development comes into play. Personal development is about inner work as mentioned earlier. It means working on your belief system, your mindset, your habits, your decision-making, your relationship skills, your communication skills, your wardrobe, your body language, your body itself and so on. This is what’s going to make a huge difference in your dating life. This is the real answer to attracting lots of women. This is what you should be focusing your mind, time and effort on.
If you suffer from Oneitis disease it’s because you want the easy way. You want the shortcut. The quick-fix. The problem is, if that method ever works for you it will not last very long, because it’s usually coupled with distortions and other obscure problems in yourself and your relationship. So the bottom line and the only real solution is to invest time, money, hard work on developing yourself.